I know it's been a minute, but today has been an interesting day, so there will be 2 parts.... which leads me to this post....... I've learned yet another lesson in my quest of life.....
I AM EXTREMELY ILL-TEMPERED!
I've always had a relatively short fuse, but today I learned that my fuse is.... officially gone... LOL
Let me explain.
I went to the dentist today, a place I HATE! Although they aren't numero uno on my list of "10 Things I Hate," they are pretty close.... Not only did those heifers try to get me for my money, they originally tried making me feel stupidly "special." When the office manager or whatever the hell you wanna call her realized I wasn't slow and that she couldn't talk circles around me, she decided I was much brighter than the she implied and backed off. Needless to say, I got my money and on my way I went..... (Not before my "ill-tempered mannerisms" kicked into high gear though!)
So, the day continues...
(Tomorrow I have a root canal. My first ever....I'll let you know how that goes and if I even make it into the chair....)
Before I get to babbling, let me just give you my list. You'll figure it out if you know me. Otherwise, just imagine a multi-racial red-head woman with an attitude... who's from the south by the way, and you'll get it!
10. I can't stand smacking and slurping. There's just something about the sound that makes my skin crawl. My husbands love his "Honey-Nut Cheerios" and does it solely for the reaction. One day, he will never eat Cheerios again......
9. Mumbling. I'm getting older and wiser, but my ears seem to be getting worse. SPEAK THE HELL UP! There's nothing more aggravating than someone trying to make me feel deaf cause they can't speak clearly. I guess we'll just be 2 non-communicating folks, cause I can't hear shit.
8. BLADES and ELBOWS! (some places call them SPOKES) If there are 2 types of automobile rims in this world that I HATE with a passion, those are the 2. Although they are high in demand and some have even given their lives for them, I will NEVER, let me repeat, NEVER EVER EVER own any. Ugh, I live in "SLAB" country....
7. When a restaurant can't comprehend "Well-Done!" It never fails, I always end up with under-cooked meat... Well, by my expectations and standards, it's not done. Unfortunately, as much as I'd love to show my "true-colors," that's just one thing I won't do in any situation where my food is involved. 'Cause if a bitch spits in my shit............ (See what I mean by "ill-tempered?")
6. When people cut me off on the road. Need I say more???? LOL
5. The way Californian's talk. It's quite hilarious to me and I'm pretty sure they feel the same about me with my heavy accent. But what's with all the extra annunciations of each letter and syllable? Not to mention the "high-talk". We all know you toke it, cuz California promotes it! LOL But really though.... relax... you're not in English class anymore. No need for the prim and proper.... Come see us southerners and add a little "twang" to your tongue.... ;)
4. Walking and texting. The next idiot that decides to walk in front of me while texting and not paying attention...I swear I'm going to make them fall! Hey, then they can trade places with me at the dentist...LOL think I won't??????
3. The lack of walking space in the mall. I think there should be a law in the mall corridor to the same extent as there is on a one-way. You cannot walk both directions on either side. ONE-WAY
PEOPLE! Maybe I should start being like my husband and letting others move out the way or let 'em get hit. Didn't a certain rapper have a song with such a title??? "Move Bitch, Get Out The Way...."
2. The Dentist! I don't do drills, scraping, pulling, cracking, or the whole needle in my mouth to make me feel nothing game. It's a lie I tell ya, cuz I can still feel it! No way, no how. If I can avoid it, I will do so for as long as humanly possible. I'm pretty sure that's why I'm in the "root-canal" mess I'm in as it is. Oh well......NEXT!
1. People. Not all people, but most. Specifically the ones that are ignorant, stupid, fake, liars, cheaters, and those that are plumb lazy. (I'll save my experiences with each one of these types for another day....) I believe that I just included everybody.... By the way, I'm NOT sorry if you're offended. So basically, if you are, that just means by my account, that you fall into one or more of those categories! LOL
I was going to delve further into detail about my dislikes, but I think I'll spare you for the moment and save the rest for "Part 2."
See ya after the "Root-Canal!"
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